Saturday, January 31, 2009

loneliness-helpless!!

today, 31th of january, i'm the earliest one who go back to college during this chinese new year. needless to say, i felt loneliness and fear to stay alone in my room. also, i have to worry so muc stuffs -- those stupid assignment! i have to finish it before the deadline! oh gosh! i wish i can stay at home and no need came back so earlier. yet, the only purpose i came back earlier is because of LION DANCE! haih.....i enjoy the moment i play lion dance performance with my lion dance troupe friend, but i'm also felt very tired......very very tired........
this chinese new year is very special for me. its quite interesting when i cry during chinese new year...., while i shouldn't do that, and i never do that before. why? i felt a little sad for this chinese new year. there are so many unexpected things and incidents happened during this season. i felt very tired.....very tired and loneliness......helpless.....no one can understand my feeling. i couldn't tell othe people about my secret! i'm stucked in my past! and i can't even step out of that! i guess, no one can save me......hopeless....
i wonder, is it we will be mature when we step in university? because this is the real world? i wonder why should we have all those mature feeling in our mind? why can't we just mantain our feeling of happy in childhood?
i still wonder.....still searching any answer.....still hoping that someone can help me.....

3 comments:

XiaoFang said...

my dearest fren...i can understand ur feeling...v will oways feel lonely esp in uni although it cant b denied tat v hv a lots of fren thr..sumtime i oso dunno y...bt, d thing tat i m vy vy sure is ..avtime i will feel warm and sweet whenever i m in sp..hanging around wif av1 of urs n family..
u must keep in mind tat changes n cognitive development will b continuous until u reach ur late adulthood..i m sure av1 hv bcum more matured afta steping in our respective uni...v can c many diff kind of ppl around..v will face a lot of trouble tat v nvr faced it b4...n many n many.. 4 me..i reli face many many problem ...n sumtime i reli hope tat thr r sum1 who can oways by my side...suporting me n encouraging me...as i nvr 4get my dreams...n here..none..totaly none of them can support my dreams...ppl will keep saying tat enjoying is d most important thing in ur uni life..bt..i wan my bright future..!!
my dear fren.. remember...tough process will usualy bring 2 a satisfied outcome... i m not sure i m rite o not...bt tis is d thing tat i oways talk 2 myself whnever i was "lost" in my journey....
must jiayou!! call me whenver u nid sum1 2 talk 2...i willb a good listener... n DUN 4GET.i minor in psycology 1 o...haha!!
ah cha ah cha fighting!!

Natalie Tan Li Chin a.k.a SmoothTan said...

there's alwez a kid in us... ppl call me childish.

Natalie Tan Li Chin a.k.a SmoothTan said...

u've been tagged. check out my blog.